In eternity decades are no more significant than a second, what is of value is the eternal now.
On Planet Earth living in our time and space reality a new decade will begin in a few hours’ time.
To some at midnight tonight there will be a turning point for a new start, for new hope. To others turning points, new starts and new hopes exist in each passing moment.
One thing is for sure that we are traveling in time together. Isn’t it exciting?
There is always someone to remind us of things we miss to see, teach us new lessons and hold our hands when we can no longer feel the strength tapping into our deepest wisdom and intuitive power. There is always potential for someone to be there with us to help us to get in alignment with our own truth.
When we see a living breathing example of real courage next to us, it inspires us that we can reach higher to be our braver selves.
Aren’t we lucky that there are apparently 7.7 billion people live on our planet? If you don’t have one of those courageous ones next to you seek for them.
I would like to encourage all parents around the world to be brave. Our lives are formed by defining choices big and small. The quality of our lives and our children’s lives depend on the quality of our communication with ourselves and ultimately with everything around us.
To create the changes we seek we must raise our standards in every aspect of our lives. What you no longer willing to tolerate? Write it down! Get a journal and start writing. Journaling is one of the most powerful tools to transform our lives.
Focus creates!
You can start with writing down what is important to you in your family: what are your morals? your standards? what is a must for you in the upbringing of your child/children? are good manners important? respect? honesty? cleanliness? kindness? healthy lifestyle? quiet time? family time? etc
Write down your three main values in your family:
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What is often missed is that these values/standards must be translated to every single family member regardless of their abilities until the child is at an age that they may choose their own ways.
For example if a child has a disability is it acceptable that they would hurt another person? Is it acceptable that they would throw things on the floor? Is it acceptable that they would eat with food around their mouth?
The answer is no. Your expectation must be age-appropriate and children must be taught at an age-appropriate level in order to establish an orthofunctional existence and meaningful connections in life (i.e. functioning as part of the family in the most active way and contributing according to abilities and physical skills).
(It is irrelevant that you might have been given a diagnosis that your 7 years old child is functioning on an 18-month-old level. This isn’t helpful and actually detrimental to your child and the way you would form your expectations and beliefs about their capabilities)
You would be surprised at how very young children, seemingly severely disabled can control their family members in a heartbeat! We have known children who didn’t want to sleep in their own beds at a young age and now aged 12 they are still sleeping with their parents because the habits are too hard to break now.
In order to establish the routines early on you will have to become strong, focussed and develop a sense of consistency and continuity in your approach with a light-hearted attitude.
You are not expected to be super mum or dad but you will need to discover your own strengths and skills so that you know how you can utilise them to support your child. You may be in a large family or maybe a single parent/carer.
If we want to say yes to life we must say yes to life experiences. While saying to ourselves – I don’t know how it is going to be done, but I am determined to find the answers that satisfy me and my child’s aspirations and needs.
I appreciate all mothers and fathers who are trying to make a difference and having the attitude of- ‘that is the mountain I am taking next.’
If you are part of our conductive family you know of our understanding and approach to neurological conditions that they are the ‘disorganisation of the central nervous system’ so a better organisation needs to be taught. This does not only translate to cellular organisation and organisations of neuro pathways but the organisation of the body, thoughts, functions etc. in our three-dimensional physical world.
Probably one of the first things you would need to know that for our children it can be extremely terrifying not to know what will happen next. They are often packed into the car and taken to appointment after appointment and not knowing even where they are going. They don’t know what will happen next in their day, at school etc.
Establishing a daily routine is vital to your child’s feelings of security and safety. It provides structure, boundaries and allows opportunities for skills to be translated into different parts of the day. The order of your own daily routine depends upon your main targets for your child.
What are you hoping to achieve in the long term? As this must begin now.
We must look at what our children doing today and how would that affect them in 10 years, 20 years time. What will happen in 10 years time if I continue to do the same things with them and let them do the things that they are doing now?
Write down the 5 main goals you have for your child (i.e. feeding themselves, getting out of bed, learning to sit, standing, stepping, communicating etc.) Be as specific as possible.
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Write down what do you have to do differently in order to reach those goals.
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Children without additional needs learn many many skills at the same time. If you observe them when they are playing they are using their hands to manipulate an object while using their eyes for learning and using their trunk, upper and lower body to maintain their balance. The child may be talking as they are playing, listening to what others are saying and at the same time developing an acute awareness of the whole world around them.
Contrary to popular belief our children are no different in the way how they learn which is why they must be taught, reminded and challenged to divide their attention between many functions and skills at once.
For example many families have separate times for walking practice or a separate speech session when a SLT may come into the home, another appointment may be a therapy appointment which addresses the hands another therapy appointment the legs or balance.
This approach creates a fragmented input in fulfilling the child’s complex developmental needs and aspirations. For a child having an organisation problem it is impossible to integrate them, as well as transferring them into daily functional skills.
Therefore it is imperative that the whole day’s daily routine flows in a natural way and all skills are thought as part of a functioning daily existence.
On 9th of February for 6 weeks I will be holding an interactive call with those who wish to work through the above points and more; running on a thursday of each week 11.00am-12.00pm. These calls are for one-hour, however at times, can go slightly over. For those who are unable to attend, a recording of the session will be available on our member’s area.
Course fee for the duration of the 6 weeks is £57.
Please email me your interest at info@juditszathmary.com.
I do hope this New Year/Decade will bring days that are beautiful, with new dreams and happy moments to you and your loved ones.
May all the sweet magic of life conspire to fill your heart with joy and peace.
May your heart open, joy emerge, energy flow through you. May you heal and help others!
With my full hearted admiration to your commitment for taking You and Your Life to the next level.
Judit O